Sunday, November 8, 2009
That was a great feeling to see my name in print again! Aaah it's a GREAT feeling!
I really have graduation fever too! I am not that many credits away from graduating but being here in LV doing this internship is kind of putting me behind! Although, I need this intership credit to graduate. I almost just want to not graduate and move to LA and get started.
That is how bad I am itching to begin! I just know that employers will hire you more when you have a degree. I want to graduate too because my high school graduation was not memorable at all and I want to have an amazing college graduation with friends and family and a big cake, etc.
So the question is can I just get my shit together, finish out this internship here in Las Vegas till mid January and then get my butt back to Reno and graduate and then get on the career train?! Choo choo!!
Thursday, November 5, 2009
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
I am not perfect.
I just found out recently who my real friends are. I can count them all on one hand. I have a great family and we are not perfect and all have our flaws, but I love each and every one of them.
I am finding out about myself more everyday. I had a lot of reflection time when I was in Europe this summer.
I am starting to realize the small details I get from both my mother and father and especially my mom's mother, my grandmother.
I do not want to live in Nevada forever.
I want to travel everywhere!
I need to forget about the past and why it didn't work out with my exes. They are exes for a reason.
I need to look towards the future.
I want to live in Boston. But I am terrified of the east coast and to be that far away from my family.
I want to model and act.
I want to see my name in PRINT!! EVERYWHERE.
I want to meet my prince charming. Does he even exsist?
I want my grandma to live till she is 100.
I want to be happy.
Monday, October 12, 2009
I am happy (for once in a long time) that I am taking the time to worry about MYSELF. The NO BOYS ALLOWED sign should be tattooed across my chest. haha. I think that every girl should always make sure she is happy with herself before she starts a new relationship with any man (or woman depending on your type ladies). I am excited to do the little things for me like sit home and paint my toes, or hang out with my mom, dad or siblings without having to stress about the big picture, that is usually one that involves a guy in my life.
Although sometimes I get lonely I do have my guy friends to cheer me up and defintely the ladies in my life, here in Vegas that are amazing. I miss my Reno chicas to death! :(
I can't wait to go visit you girls. (Ed you are included)
So, as I sit here brainstorming questions that I am going to ask Playboy Playmate Sara Stokes tomorrow, I think, "WOW. I think I might turn over that new leaf where I do NOT need anyone to MAKE me happy... I can do it all by myself (: "
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Then I met up with friends from Reno, Caitlin and Kyle, and we were in Amsterdam for another 5 days and then it was off to Edinburgh, Scotland! What a blast that was. One of the nights I successfully lost Caitlin and got to party with a stag (bachelor) party with 6 Irish men. Aaron, (the groom-to-be), Stephen, Matt, David, Phil and Sonnie. Haha many of these men's name have some correlation in my life, go figure. Then I said goodbye on about day 7 to Caitlin and Kyle and got on a train to go visit Phil in Glasgow, Scotland where I hung out with him and 2 of his mates from work (all accountants, can we say boring?)
Then it was back to Edinburgh, for sure my favorite destination my entire trip where I checked into a new hostel, The Smart City Hostel and met Jayden and Nigel (Leo DiCaprio and Shaggy) and danced the next 4 nights away and camped 25 minutes outside of Edinburgh in the most amazing campsite ever! Then after all of that I actually had the energy to attend BURNING MAN for the 1st time ever with 70 pf my closest friends from Reno. The drive was only about an hour and half and as I pulled in, my gas light went on! It was nice to be single for all of this too!
Of course I did not write all of this in my resume, but wouldn't that be cool to let your new employer know what an amazing trip you had and it shaped you to be who you are now? I have a feeling that they will soon find out (;
Monday, September 28, 2009
Nothing better than curling up on the couch with a loved one watching an intense game of America's great game of football.
I was just in Europe and I watched a lot of futbol... haha not the same sport at all. I was sooo stoked to walk into the OZ bar in Edinburgh, Scotland to see that they had satellite TV and had the NFL on! Haha I felt like Ashton Kutcher in Just Married... "It's a message from GOD!" LOL.
I have to say that when I was 12 years old and I watched the Denver Broncos win the Superbowl, from then I have been a Bronco fan... then we lost Mike Shannihan and then our QB, Cutler and then half of our players were in jail for stupid things. So to say the least I was ready to switch teams.
I pick teams mostly on the city they are representing. Not by the player like my lil brother or most of my exes. I think that when I went to Minneapolis, Minnesota for the UFC fight I fell in LOVE with the city. My friend Graham is a Vikings fan and I always thought they had potential. I decided I would change teams to the Vikings. Then Brett Favre (who is kind of being a whiny bitch these days) was declared their new QB.
Now everyone will think that I am just jumpin on the damn bandwagon. So I started watching pre-season and they seemed to be holding their own. Also, suprisingly, the Broncos were as well. I was dating a guy back in the day who was absolutely OBSESSED with the Dallas Cowboys, they are also holding their own and I am actually watching the Cowboys vs. the Panthers as I type...
So, on that note, I think I will return to Monday Night Football.
I guess my family put the "fun" in dysfunctional. But let's be honest here, what family isn't absolutely outta their tree? No really, I watched the movie Now and Then and I was listening to Teenie (Thora Birch's character) and she is explaining to Sam (Gaby Hoffman) that there are NO perfect families out there. Like the Brady Bunch, for example, Carol and Mike were both widowers, and same with the Von Trapp family and every other squeaky clean sitcom family that everyone wants to try and immitate. Yup there is no perfect family out there. Especially not mine. BUT we all HAVE to love eachother right? I guess. I love myself right now. That is all I am trying to focus on because sometimes I wish that my family (immediate) would just let me be for a second and not try and tell ME what is the best for ME. Because they don't know shit.
My oldest sister had to do the same thing. She had to say, "I am # 1" and she didn't talk to any of us for days, weeks, months. And that was fine with me because I was in Reno, NV, and they were all in Las Vegas. Now I am in HELL. A.K.A. Las Vegas with my family, with no phone.
If only I would have got together some money to have a nice studio to live in and then got into a job somewhere in Reno, I would not have to be in HELL.
Can anyone hear me?
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Some drama and back stabbing came up from my past. Apparently a "best-friend" that I used to call my best friend for many years, slept with one of my exes like a week after he broke up with me...
Ya she is a gem.
Oh well she doesn't live here anymore so I guess I can live with the fact that people make STUPID drunken mistakes. Eww. The thought of it makes me want to puke in my mouth. again. She used to be cute but then resorted to cigs ( a pack a day ) and lots and lots of beer. Anyways, whats done is now done and nothing I can do to change the past.
FUCK. She is calling me right now this is awkward.
Monday, May 25, 2009
He explained to me that he does not think that one person can be faithful to the other person, that instead of telling the truth we lie in our relationships so we don't hurt the other person's feelings. We don't show our true colors for a long time and then it is too late (esp for guys I thought) so instead we lie or become these people that, in fact, we are not. Also the divorce rate is way larger then those couples that actually do stay married. Look at your parents or your friends' parents how many are still really married? (mine never even got married after my mom had me AND my older sister by the time she was 20 and my dad was 22!)
I was in shock at his reasoning, because I really do see the perfect relationship with this guy that I really care about to death, but I have not even been with him for that long... Ugh. Then there is my wretched past that does not EVER escape me. You know that one relationship that was so on and off you are not really sure if it was even real, but when you weren't wanting to kill eachother you actually saw a future?? Ha. ya. Kill me.
SO. I am really having some major questions in my head here. Was he right? And does love not exist? It's just a fantasy we make up in our heads? I sure hope not, because even if i did get this theory and information that made me question love, I still totally believe in it. Call me Charlotte from Sex and the City who wants the fairy tale ending... but I do.
I will totally step into the new roller coaster ride that I about to encompass with that new special someone with a strong head on my shoulders and my heart in his hands.
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Ha! I am not EVEN trying to feel sorry for myself, I am opening my eyes to the real people of this town and they are showing me their true colors! I feel like it's actually revealing. All people that I have unresolved issues with are out in the open and friendships have ended, and you know what I am OK with that!
I would rather have a handful of very close friends then a bunch of people that call themselves my friends and talk crap behind my back.
I think I could write a book on how many times I have been screwed over by bitches. And it's not just girls.
Maybe there is something wrong with me...wait... nope. I consider myself a pretty damn good friend!
LOL. Well anyways, all I want is to be with my guy and move to San Diego and meet new girls and keep my small circle of girlfriends here close and start a life of adventure without the drama! Aaah I cannot wait till then!! Until then I will have to keep my eye out for the fake labeled girls/guy friends and focus on myself!!
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
Now to deal with the 3 finals that I have pretty much back to back tomorrow! I wish that teachers would know that not only do we have to stress about all the damn small stuff, the big stuff like graduating and getting As makes us pretty much so damn stressed we end up in the hospital with anxiety attacks and can't breath!! Now I am just babbling, I needed to write something because writing helps me relax.
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Spur of the momentness......... Current mood: adventurous Category: Travel and Places
So pretty much I have never done what I did this past Wednesday...
Have you ever been so mad at someone, something or some situation that all you can do is scream, cry or just plain wanna fight someone? Well I have and that was not too long ago this past Wednesday. Now I am not going into detail the severity of the situation bc it's not even a big deal... but I was HAMMERED, no really, like so drunk I was taking shots of Jameson (by myself) at the bar and then at 4 a.m. I thought it was a good idea to get out my credit card and book a flight to LAS VEGAS.
I am from there so its not like I was like ok, let me book a flight and then stay at the Motel 6, no I just wanted to get the hell outta suck town.
SO around 7 a.m. I was flying into Vegas and the plane landed and I was passed the hell out, so I thought we were crashing and I screamed! lol, the man next to me probably thought I was crazy.
I then proceeded to ask him, "Excuse me, sir, are those your water bottles?" He responded... "ya...." I said, "Can I buy one off you?" He was like, "sure... but they are water from the water fountain." I was like I DO NOT CARE, how much do you want?" lol he refused to take money from a drunkass and just gave me it. Bless his heart.
At this point I was still hammered. I called my mom who had already gotten a drunk dial from me at 3 a.m. (parents love those) and said, "Hey what are you doing?" "She was like ummm sleeping..." "Ok well come pick me up from the airport I am here." She was a little shocked.
So I get onto that stupid little train that u have to go to baggage claim in I am already fucking spinning and I swear I almost threw up on the person next to me.
My mom came and got me and then I was like, "oh, shit. I work tonight." Ya thank you Kyle for covering my shift you are amazing.
So I had a good time here in Vegas. Sometimes you just need to see your family and friends and the people you grew up with. Also it is good to just get the hell away for a little bit!
But Reno, don't you worry your pretty little head, I will be back in 4 hours!!!!!!!
Things that make me happy:-My boo :)-My amazing friends (: -Listening to John Mayer-Trivia Night at the Taphouse on the river-Mashed potatoes and gravy (KFC's are amazing)-Working out and taking Patrick's Hip hop classes-Quiting my job and never been so sure in my life that I wanted a change! -Bartending! -Dirty Filthy grey goose martinis! Carina got me hooked! Love you Bean-Vacays, even if it is for a day and night to see a movie with my mommy in Las Vegas. -Getting a phone call and seeing that it is my older sister, lil sis or lil bro. -Romantic, silly, cheesey comedies-Surfing the web-Doing nothing but laying in bed all day with my two boys (Matt and his dog Willie). -Watching the Broncos win. -New things, like a new pizza cutter, t-shirt, or getting my nails or hair did! -Kareoke and rapping haha I can actually rap! -My grades being above average like last semester! 3.5 GPA baby! -Getting ready to study abroad in Spain this summer! -Brooke and I hanging out! -Not feeling hungover haha! -Magazines!! Love reading them cover to cover!-Buying art.-Facebook chat! -Blogging! -Summer!! CAN IT HURRY AND GET WARM!?-Playing my banjo, I am still learning the chords Pat Pat! -Catching up with my best friend in Las Vegas, Michelle! -Having coffee and gossiping with Jackie C.! -Having roomie time! -Polly Pocket my kitty sitting on my lap and purring! -laughing! =D
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Friday, March 27, 2009
Monday, March 16, 2009
Can't wait to see what the future holds.
My cousin Alex, on the other hand is 11 and is a cute little surfer lookin dude. He is so smart it shocks me. He is doing a research on the brain and I read his introduction and was appalled. He is in school right now and Mia has gymnastics so that is why my uncle and I are headed to the museum. I am going to head out now, just wanted to blog a little for all my readers! Hope you are all having a wonderful Monday!!
One of the most significant smells to me is a cologne called Polo Double Black that I bought for my boyfriend, Matt, for his birthday. He was my first love in college and I bought him this lovely scent for his 25th birthday. Picking out the cologne at the counter it had a variety of wonderful smells of lilac and a musky smell. At first, this scent made me so happy and would bring a smile to my face if I smelt it elsewhere besides on Matt, because it would make me think of him! I dated Matt for an entire year and he was for sure my first and only love. Matt cheated on me after about a year and now whenever I smell that scent of Polo Double Black cologne I have a rush of mixed emotions consisting of anger, hate, sadness and disgust.
Another smell that was a pleasant smell to me was that of hot churros at Disneyland being made by the street vendors on Main Street. My family is huge Disney fans and so I have probably been to Disneyland over a dozen times since I was 4. I absolutely love the odor of cinnamon and sugar in a delicious churro! Whenever I smell this scent I think of riding the Teacups and Splash Mountain. I feel like a kid again with no worries in the world. I am really excited to smell that wonderful scent again because I am headed to Anaheim, California to visit the happiest place in the world for Spring Break!
The last smell that I unfortunately remember is the smell of formaldehyde from my junior year of Anatomy in high school. We had to dissect cats of all things, and they all smelt of formaldehyde and it was the most disgusting scent that will haunt me forever! I was not a cat owner at the time, but I am now and I cannot believe I had to dissect poor cats with that awful odor that smelt like a combination of bleach, throw up and acid! I love my cat and I would have refused to do the activity, but you failed the class if you did that, so that was out of the question.
Question # 5
A treasured space of mine would have to be my old bedroom at my grandma’s house where I grew up. I was raised by my grandma and mother and my older sister and I shared a room that had so many antiques and dolls and was a little girl’s dream. I lived there from when I was born to about age 13. I really enjoyed going into the room by myself and playing with my American doll named Molly McIntire and getting lost in imagination. I would have her wear different outfits and go on different adventures in my mind. That was my own personal space and I did not want to share it with anyone else.
This space communicated to my mother and grandmother that they could leave me alone for hours and I could entertain myself, unlike my older sister who needed their attention and an entertainment director 24/7. I did share some of this space with my sister, Toni, but for the most part I liked to be alone in my pink and white trimmed room of wonder. I think this space was essential for my well-being because my mom was working at one of the casinos at night in Las Vegas, where I grew up, and I needed her there, but I knew she was working to support us and not having a father figure around at the time I needed some distraction to not actually realize that. I now think that my imagination that I had in that space made me a better person, more creative and open minded.
So when I was 19 I was asked to do a calendar called College Cuties. At the time, I thought it was a great idea! But then I got to the photo shoot and they wanted me in a shower looking like this. I mean c'mon really? Ok, don't get me wrong what girl wouldn't want any guy drooling over them? But some of the chicks in this calendar were not as up to par as some of the others! I am so not trying to be conceited.
I really loved the experience, it was a lot of fun. The funniest thing was that I was at the Wal (a college bar in Reno by the university) and some guy I didn't even know was like, "Hey I know you, I mean I think I have seen you. I don't know...wait... did you do that calendar a couple of years ago!?" I was like shit. really? Are you kiddin me right now... "Yes, I did, I was Ms. November." Ha funny, small world.
So this picture is when I was a sophomore in college and all I did was smoke hookah and drink and party. I am now a senior at UNR and I am realizing that I for sure need to stop this nonsense, partying that is.
I seriously think that getting a dui (last Friday) opened up my eyes. I really am happy this happened to me because it was such an eye opener!
Long story short, it is time for K2theTina to calm it down!